She realized she was enmeshed in an unhealthy medicated family and found herself in a position of needing to find answers and solutions. Linda is the oldest daughter, and a college student, who shared having trouble with her schoolwork and was under the care of a physician who prescribed antidepressants. She sensed her problems were related to her father’s gambling and drinking. After some encouragement, Linda brought her mother to our next session. The mother confirmed her husband’s gambling and alcohol problem and added he took sleeping pills and tranquilizers. Prescribed by the same doctor who was treating the daughter, this mixture of meds was supposed "to help him deal with his job stress and cut down on his need to gamble and drink." Further discussion uncovered Mom was using large amounts of tranquilizers daily prescribed by—you guessed it—the same doctor "to help her cope during this trying time."

Donna, another daughter, was taking medication for hyperactivity, also dispensed by the family doctor. Not to be left out, the teenage son, Todd, was a heavy marijuana smoker. Here we have an entire family under the influence of some sort of mind-altering chemical, and we learn the beginning is to deal with the financial stress, brought on by Dad’s gambling, and then shifting to his alcoholism.

A successful intervention, after much counseling with each of the family members, did precipitate Dad’s entrance into treatment. During the family interaction, the chemical use by each family member was eventually revealed. The primary focus on Dad shifted, and in time, through out-patient treatment for all of them and a considerable period of aftercare, the entire family was chemical free, Dad was "off the bet" every family member was committed in recovery.

An abstinent Dad, equipped with a clear head and putting in a full day’s work, found that most of his "job stress" had been generated by his attempt to balance financial issues due to gambling and his alcohol consumption. Mom accepted her powerlessness over tranquilizers just as her husband had gambling and alcohol. She learned how to deal with her feelings openly and honestly, to assert her needs before she became angry and frustrated, and to feel good about herself. She joined two different self-help groups with programs for living that led to new, positive, and supportive friends. She discarded her tranquilizers.

Linda, whose courage in reaching out for help no doubt saved the family, was taken off of medication by her physician who came to learn her suspected depression was not primary, but due to the result of living in a gambling/alcoholic family.

Frequently the depression seen in addiction dependent family members is simply anger turned inward because it is not safe to express it openly. In this case, Linda was able to process her anger in the safety of treatment, her depression and the need for medication disappeared. Likewise, Donnas’ hyperactivity quickly faded once peace returned to the family, and so too her need for medication. Todd, the only family member who was not on prescription medication, was confronted about his marijuana abuse. In treatment with his family members he learned his grandfather and great grandfather had both been alcoholic, and he wisely chose to abstain.

Walking through the complex dynamics of addiction-controlled families like this is not easy. A family, presenting a complex array of problems such as gambling, depression, job stress, marriage conflicts, hyperactivity and teenage rebellion, require specialists to diagnose the underlying primary disease. Finding the specialist that would best suit the presenting issues is as important as the family work that will follow. This work includes but is not limited to professional direction to view family, health, spiritual and financial enlightenment. Learning to express needs honestly, gives feedback, listens actively and empathizes with each other, is some of the many lessons learned and practiced over time. Reaching out and not keeping the family dynamics secret any longer is the most difficult of the process. It begins with one person, taking the risk to share openly and then healing in the family can begin.